In life, we are due to make many choices. That is life. We were created by God to be beings of free will, that we have the freedom to do anything we want. For example, choosing to go to school or play truant and stay at home to sleep/watch TV. Or else, a simple yes/no whether you ought to take drugs. We are free to make choices, and some will influence our lives, some have greater repercussions which might affect others too.

Yet it's sad to say that for some choices we won't get to see the outcome until much later. For example, I can choose to take drugs, like heroin, to give myself a temporary induced high. I can do that for a few years, hide my addiction and feel good all the time, yet 20-30 years down the road my body may then show the signs and sympotoms of drug abuse. Or else, I could choose to indulge in fornication (sex outside marriage), and then contract some sexually transmitted disease without knowing it until I go for a proper medical check-up.

In economics we learn the concept of opportunity cost. It is defined as the highest valued alternative you have to forego in order to satisfy a need/want. For example, if I choose to abstain from sex until after marriage, the opportunity cost to me would be the sexual gratification I miss out on. However, it does not take into account moral values of society.

It is a choice too, whether people want to believe in a God or gods or not at all. Christianity says that if you believe the saving grace of Jesus Christ, that by His death on the cross He redeemed our lives so that we would have an eternal life with Him in heaven forever. Islam says that those who are true to the faith, and perform holy wars against the infidels (non-Muslims) will spend eternity in paradise surrounded by virgins. Taoism says that when one dies one will be reincarnated, and after many many years and cycles of life will finally attain immortality. Which is true and which isn't?

It is a choice we have to make. I can choose to believe in Taoism, and think that I will be reincarnated when I die, but what happens if I find out after I die that I won't be reincarnated and ned up in hell because I didn't believe in Jesus Christ? Or I may choose to trust Islam and wage a holy war, but how can I be sure that I won't end up being reincarnated as a pig or dog in my next life (which incidentally is haram [unclean] to a Muslim)?

Now Jesus said "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me (John 14:6)." Through His life as a God-indwelt man He has proven Himself righteous and true, that even the Pharisees, the "righteous men" of the time, were unable to prove Him guilty of sin (John 8:46)! Is that valid enough, or that people choose not to believe in Christ just because they don't want to accept that fact?

Joel.

Must you wait to the very end then you realise that some people whom you regarded as "close friends" don't actually give much thought to you at all? Granted, they may be busy, or preoccupied with other stuff, but when they see you they don't even ask about you (and I'm currently still on long term MC with a cracked foot right now). What sort of friends are these? Those you treat as close to you but who don't bat an eyelid to your problems/predicaments --- are they just fairweather friends? But indeed, those who find it redundant to even talk to you, then that's a different story.

Reminds me of primary school days where 2 young kids would be "best friends" and after that when moving on to secondary school and further education would end up losing contact with each other, only to meet up years later at some class gathering and realise that "he/she used to be my best friend! My goodness!" and make contact again. However that's not the case with most friendships, usually friendships started from primary school can be sustained all the way till working life and beyond, but the bulk of friends are made in JC/university.

Yet familiarity breeds contempt. Possible? Maybe you're too comfortable with someone that you neglect on enquiring about his/her life, and instead ignore the poor person unwittingly instead. What does that smack of? The I-couldn't-be-bothered-wi th-you syndrome, which is highly defective. It is said, "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching (Hebrews 10:24-25)." Granted, humans are sinful, and it is human to err, but how easy it is to tell someone his attitude is defective? It could be one's own pride, being hurt at no one caring, seeking attention only, or it could be that there's something wrong with that person indeed. But who is man to judge another man?

As Paul says, "You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God's judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance (Romans 2:1-4)?" We are in no position to judge others for being callous in our own sight when it is our own feelings that are wounded. The closer you treat the friend to be the more wounded you feel. But yet you can always be guilty of the same sin unknowingly, be it towards that person too, or to others!

Fret not, we have a friend who never passes away. In the end all friends are mortal and they die, but Jesus Christ never dies because He has conquered death by being resurrected 3 days after He died! And He lives again. No matter how much we grieve Him the fact is He still wants to be our friend and He has already given up His life for us! What other better friend can we find than that?  

Joel.

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect (Matthew 5:43-47)."

What right is it of ours to feel bitter when someone else rubs us off in a way contrary to what we think they would do, especially for your own loved ones? What right is there? We imperfect humans have snubbed God so many times over that if He weren't God but some all-powerful mortal human He'd have struck us all dead. Or executed us by now. But He is, after all, the ever-loving Father from above who doesn't want to see us perish but come to eternal life with Him (2 Peter 3:9). So, who are we to feel hurt/neglected/unwanted and therefore allow the sin of bitterness to fester deep within our lives? When Christ died for the world He was neglected by the world. And yet He chose to save the world. Isn't that, then, the very attitude we should adopt? Love for each other, unconditionally, no matter what happens. Even when people don't love you, you have to love them. That's a fact. Christianity is all about love, because the One we believe in, the Almighty God, is love (1 John 4:8,16).

It is easier said than done. Who can love his friends for not bothering to encourage when they're down (close friends especially, and thinking that it's a waste of time to because they themselves have other better things to do)? Who can love his parents for sometimes poking their noses into your affairs because they care and you don't tell them about what's happening? Who, then, can love his enemies, those who badmouth him and have only a wish to see his destruction?

Personally I find it difficult. I've had all these thrown at me before. And I know I can't do it. As Paul says, "But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me (1 Corinthians 15:10)." It is not by our own effort, but by the grace of God that produces results.

As my MC extends its way through, God is revealing more painful areas in my life to get rid off and I'm thankful for that.

Joel.

"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)."

It may be really innocuous. Boy meets girl. Boy gets to know girl. Boy starts dating girl. Boy goes "steady" with girl. They start holding hands in public. Hugging. Kissing. And one night their passion (or rather, lust) runs wild and they end up doing something that shouldn't be done. Which they will regret after that and it may bring about serious repercussions. For example, unwanted teenage pregnancies. A feeling of being sexually exploited by the female. They will never look at each other the same way again.

Sadly, some of these people involved happen to be Christians. All around the world Christian males and females face the same temptations. Yet Paul says, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it (1 Corinthians 10:13)."

Moreover, James says, "When tempted, no one should say, 'God is tempting me.' For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death (James 1:13-15)."

The devil is a very interesting personality. He is the one enticing us to sin. Full of ideas about how to make people fall into his trap to end up in a godless eternity with him forever, he will never fail to attack anyone who is particularly vulnerable to it. For example, adolescent boys who take an accidental glance at a "Men's Magazine", like FHM or Maxim. In Singapore, no nudity is allowed, but overseas, it is no-holds-barred. Men are stimulated by sight, and they will want to devour these womens' bodies whenever they see it.

So if he can entice us to sin, and trap us there, then he will change his tack and accuse us of being low-life sinful scum, how would God be able to accept us? So we end up being suckered into that trap which we feel is hopeless to get out from, and we find ourselves in a vicious cycle. The feelings of sinful pleasure, then the feelings of guilt. Where we think God is so holy and we're rubbish/garbage/trash compared to Him, that He's the disciplinarian Father who will pounce at our every mistake...

Fact is, NO. God knows that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23)." Now if He actually were the disciplinarian to punish us for every wrongdoing we've done then Jesus Christ would've suffered an unjust death. For "at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:6-8)." If God loves us so much that He sent His Son to be the redeeming sacrifice for our sin, then why would He scold us for the sins that we're doing all over again?

He's just waiting for us to return to Him, and confess that we're sinners who don't deserve His mercy and grace, but by His grace He restores us to our positions as children of the Most High God. "For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory (Romans 8:13-17)."

So indeed, as children of God we have to live a life worthy of His calling (Ephesians 4:1; Colossians 1:10), for we do not live according to the enslavement of the sinful nature any more, but we are living a life that is victorious in Jesus Christ!

Joel.